A young dad’s critical view of breastfeeding
«The main advantage of being a bad father is that you are effectively disqualified for the title of unworthy mother.. As I’m rather the humble type, it would have bothered me to have both distinctions. The great thing about being a father is that because you are expected to be uninvolved (or not as you would like), you don’t get much expected from you. On the other hand, I have always been impressed by the number of injunctions to perfection which weigh on the shoulders of our dear wives. And in some cases, these injunctions can be contradictory.
If we take the example of breastfeeding, we go from one extreme to the other. Either the woman is breastfeeding and it is said that she is submissive, enslaved by breastfeeding and that she must be released, or she is not breastfeeding and it is said that she is not giving the best for her child. Not easy.
Amiko manokana, I am more for breastfeeding. From what I have read on the subject, it is rather better for the child (if Mother Nature invented the surges, it must be for a good reason). When my wife decided to breastfeed, I got up to bring the baby to her so that she didn’t have to get up at night.
ankehitriny, it must not turn into an obsession. Breastfeed at all costs, even if it does not work well, even if the mother is tired, there will always be someone to slip a little “Come on, courage, it’s better for your child”, just to make people feel guilty. . When my wife hardly slept because of our younger sister’s voracious appetite, I had to use all my negotiating skills to introduce the bottle into the diet. I won my case when I suggested that she bottle up between 1:00 and 7:00 a.m. (oddly, she didn’t find a lot of arguments against).
Even though I think I was present during breastfeeding and until it stopped, I find breastfeeding, especially if it lasts, is still a form of exclusion of the father. It may be said that the father has his place in the promotion of breastfeeding, in its “logistics” (bassinet-Mom – Mom / bassinet), the man must be part of a mother / child relationship where the Father does not necessarily have his place. Fortunately, that was not the case for me. But if my wife had been fused with our children, how could I have had a special moment with them? How could I think of my role of father apart from that of mother? During early childhood, if the father wants to get involved, should his role be limited to a supplementary role?
Although I can say that I have had happy experiences around breastfeeding, I really had a hard time talking about it to female colleagues who insulted me because I had dared to stuff my breast. nose in the privacy of my wife. To these “cold pisses”, I would just like to remind that a child, it is done with two. From beginning to end.”